I’ll recap, quickly, what’s happened over the past month and a half. In late August, I approached the NYC Lebanese Consulate, requesting a proper visa to go back to Beirut on, so that I could arrange for work papers and legalize my status in Beirut. They stamped my passport and sent it back to me.

Upon arrival at the airport in Beirut, I was barred from entering the country, and I went to Jordan. A wide range of people did their very best for me, but at the end of the day, it was to no avail.

I have booked my flight back to America, and will spend the next three months or so in Charlotte, NC, working for PayStream Advisors on an integrated communications project – I am blessed to have the opportunity to finish what I started with PayStream, and it is truly a lucky stroke to have things line up time-wise.

Taking stock of the past month, I notice two things. First, it is apparent that the ground moved too quickly, this time, beneath me, to respond. I got caught on the wrong end of a bureaucratic stamp, and there was no way to flex around the problem. Second, as a learning experience, this was a good thing – I realize now that I took this situation far too personally, and allowed it to get under my skin. As someone who would like to spend the next five years or more overseas, I’ve got to learn that luck is not always going to go in my favor, and disasters are unavoidable.

In terms of actually just growing the heck up and getting on with it, I definitely noticed that I was in profoundly serious need for an event like this. I did not do a good job of securing a proper safety net in the event that something went wrong with my paperwork, nor did I move towards a place quickly where I could emotionally accept what was happening. Indeed, I did quite the opposite – I convinced myself that things would work out, and, as I said before, I took the whole situation personally, which was a dire mistake. When it didn’t work out, I did nothing but fight it. This was a serious mistake but one I’ll learn from.

In Arabic, there are two terms which tend to govern the general thought process of many people in the Middle East. On the one hand is Insha’Allah, and on the other is Mash’Allah. The former means, “God Willing,” pointing to future events, and the latter means, “God Wills it,” pointing to the present. I would like to venture the following: Somewhere between God’s relationship with the future and the present, lies everything else – Indeed, it is here that we make our stand for sorting out what we have control over.

We need not take this from a religious or spiritualist perspective – merely acknowledging that there is so much beyond our control, b0th in the present, and the future, gets to the heart of these statements. Indeed, recognizing that there are billions of other people and so many other forces acting in tandem to our own actions and choices, is to recognize just how little control we have, and how important it is to exercise our capacity to act when it is possible, and therefore necessary, to do so.

This is perfectly encapsulated in the age-old prayer, “grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.” Where does that wisdom come from? I can only say, as someone who is as young as I, that it comes not from theoretisizing, but from experience. And experience is something I lack. I lack it in spades.

But I am pleased to say that, for what it’s worth, this was an experience that I’ll relish, although I don’t know how I’ll pay back the debts I’ve accumulated from this episode.

Gosh! What a month. I have to say it was not pleasant, but it was what it was. I’m still standing, still breathing… I wasn’t able to shift my weight on this occasion. And, to the ire of several people who I know have my best interests in mind, I even managed to lash out at the American government… something I probably should not have done.

Well, consider this my apology… and also my very specific statement that I’m not giving up. I am not.

I look forward to getting back on American soil – I guess that makes me a bit of a hypocrite… but whatever the case is, I’ll move forward and I won’t wallow in it.

Take care all – this will be my last post on Some Guy in Lebanon until I manage to get back… if I manage to get back. Thanks for reading – to those I’ll see soon, I can’t wait to see you.

As a parting… gift… or whatever, as they are my favorite places in Beirut and the spots I’ll miss the most, here is a picture of Cafe Rawda, of Andre and Captains Cabin. Naz is in there too

And as always, I’m in debted to a good friend for his help. It’s time to take my little Middle Eastern sideshow on the road, leaving Amman, Jordan, for Dubai. I’ll be there in two weeks.

I can’t even begin to thank everyone who has done their very best to get me out of this jam with the Lebanese General Security. Hopefully, come January or February, I’ll be back in Beirut with flying colors, ready to take on the world again.

In the meantime, I must go hibernate, and see what I can see, in that city built on sand they call Dubai. Perhaps I’ll do a little indoor skiing while i’m there…

To my family, and to my friends, thank you so much.

I’d like to take this opportunity to thank one more group of people – the employees/owners of Liquid, the coffeeshop and second home of mine on Second Circle, in Amman. Here’s a picture of the store, Ahmad, and me. I would have been infinitely worse off if it wasn’t for this place… 

But it seems that there is no solution to my problem in Lebanon. For reasons I don’t understand, I am not allowed entry, not even to collect my things and empty my bank account. A work permit is the only option, but I cannot make that option work, for now.

So now I’m truly in diaspora… and it’s amazing to know what that feels like. Whatever it is that the Lebanese government assumes I’m up to, at least I know I’m not. I have infinite reasons to be upset, but for some reason, finally, after losing my cool for a few hours, I am strangely at peace with everything.

Thank you Amman for your help – And thank you Lebanon. Hopefully, somehow, I’ll see you soon.

At least I can now tell a heck of a story!

A quick remark – I would like to take this moment to bring to light the pathetic response of the American Embassy in Beirut when I called them to let them know what was going on. Their response, “We can do nothing because Lebanon is a sovereign nation and it’s their call,” was as laughable as it was infuriating.

We all know that it is American money and aid that pays for Lebanon’s roads, medical support, and much more. We all know that American tax payer money was instrumental in the arrangement of the last election. We all know that American money paid for Israeli smart bombs used in the 2006 war, and we all know that American money now pays for rebuilding the infrastructure that Israel destroyed. Don’t tell me you can do nothing – That’s what you told the Marines you sent here to die.

So – to those of you at the American Embassy, thanks for nothing. If only I was a Senator’s son! Imagine! But no, I’m just some guy in Lebanon. I would venture to guess I do more in a day to extend American goodwill than the State Department accomplishes in a year. Your lack of action that night is disgusting, as I sat in a lonely airport terminal for 12 hours, awaiting a flight to Amman.

People always ask me why I don’t register with the Embassy – Why I don’t go there, why I have nothing good to say about American foreign policy. Well, let me tell you – I have met several people who work for various European embassies in Amman, and they are all were shocked to hear that you would do nothing for your own citizen in such dire straits. Money for bombs, bridges, and votes, but not a second thought for a tax payer.

But I have taken this experience to heart, and I know now to never expect anything from my government – neither social security nor the slightest inkling of help when I’m stranded thousands of miles from home. It’s a wonder I pay taxes at all – just remember who pays for your armored SUV’s and your cushy life up on that hill, let alone for the men who protect you. Next time you buy a drink in Gemayze, just think about where your paycheck from comes as well.

In the meantime, I am reading The Age of the Unthinkable by Joshua Cooper Ramo – I can’t recommend it enough. It’s about the need to respond asymmetrically to today’s problems, and about the nature of Complexity Theory and its relationship to a world where information, decisions, and money move at the speed of light. He points out the extraordinary improvement in the movement of data – in the past one hundred years, the speed at which data moves has improved by 1,000,000,000%!

Anyways, it appears I will be back in Beirut early next week, thanks entirely to friends in Beirut. Though I blame the Consulate in New York for giving me the wrong information, I understand that they are operating within the context of Immigration policies that are fluid – Indeed, calls to various Lebanese agencies has revealed disbelief – No one can believe this happened and everyone seems to have a different reason, and I can accept that. But I am sorely disappointed with my own government’s response – We can invade countries, fund rebels, and buy elections. But for some guy in Lebanon, it’s “tough luck.” Thank you – lesson learned.

I wanted to share these: The first is from the nightclub White, the second from Chilli’s Restaurant in Achrafiyeh, and the third are from the Sea Club Sporting (they call it a beach club but there’s no beach so I refuse to honor that title, even though it’s an awesome place.

First, White – didn’t expect to be back so soon but I had a great night out there and managed to get some reasonable pictures with the phone.

Next, a frightening and bizzarre experience at Chilli’s Restaurant in Achrafiyeh, which might as well have been somewhere in the Mid West or Boston or something. A truly strange experience to walk out of Beirut and into Chilli’s!

Finally, the wonderful club Sporting – I took a 360-Degree set of shots from where we (Me, Catherine and Nick) were sitting – you can see Rouche, the Sea, South Beirut, and the Ferris Wheel at the Amusement Park.

I also had lunch at the restaurant at the Club, which sits above the main pool areas – we were sitting to the far right:

That’s all for now – Hope all is well with everyone

This way everything’s in one spot and I should get a noticable boost from the content.

It is funny to look back on all those posts – In many ways I guess I’m a little impressed I was able to get my finger nails into Jordanian society in only five months – In other ways it’s bizarre to think that that was now two years ago, and I don’t know how very far I’ve come in my physical understanding of the Middle East (or anything at all for that matter) since then.

I guess I can only hope I’m making the right call here by taking these steps towards living in and knowing a little about the Middle East… But anyways, in honor of the posts, here’s a fun picture from those good times when life was pretty much just sleep, coffee, Jordanian sand in my teeth and Holy Land snow:

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Prospects for Democracy – Final paper – Will Donovan

In the Middle East, many of the elements that are normally associated with the development of democratic nations have only strengthened the resolve of oppressive, or at least marginally liberal autocratic, regimes. Yet only with democracy will the Middle East learn to grow and progress, bringing with it peace and prosperity. At the moment, there are dozens of forces conspiring against democratic development in the region. The most specific force that this paper will not cover is renteirism, either through foreign aid or through oil profits. However, given that this system is likely to never evaporate completely from the Middle East, it goes without saying that anything more than stating that it is a chimerical force is unnecessary. However, there are five steps that the Arab countries could take that would greatly increase the prospects for democracy in the region. These steps are: Developing institutions that promote community service, overhauling the education system, ending repressive security policies, encouraging Western corporate investment while limiting foreign aid, and taking massive steps forward in women’s rights.

It is not a novel idea for the government to promote service, but in the Arab world, such institutions do not exist in any meaningful way. Volunteerism has been shown to be a fantastic way for young people to learn important skills, end engrained feelings of entitlement, place national pride before local allegiances, and develop a broader perspective of the world. Examples in America, such as FreedomCorps, AmeriCorps (which includes Teach for America), and individualized federal service grants demonstrate how effective this tool can be for encouraging (especially middle and upper class) youth to participate in their society in a meaningful way. The Israeli National Council for Volunteerism as well shows how small nations with minimal taxation potential and a heavy reliance on foreign aid can better utilize the youth. A major factor in unemployment in the Middle East is a lack of technical skill and a feeling of entitlement, a problem especially engrained in Jordanian society. Government volunteer programs are a great “meat and potatoes” way to end this through real world education and experiencing a more diverse socio-economic landscape.

The educational system in the Middle East is especially lacking, with Jordan being a perfect example of the major systemic problems in government schooling. The very fact that standardized testing in Jordanian high schools determines a career path for the rest of one’s life is exactly the issue. Further, that the students with the lowest scores often become teachers underlines the problem. The greatest step that Jordan could take would be to invite private education firms from the West, specifically companies that are working on developing charter schools and voucher schools in America, to take over the grade school system. Education should then focus on instilling work ethic, encouraging intuition and initiative, and above all else underlining merit as a driving force behind employment and schooling. Education has absolutely failed the majority of the youth, who emerge from high school and college completely indoctrinated in the anti-merit, pro-“wasta” mentality.

One of the most vital steps that Arab countries must take is to end oppressive security policies, and to make significant strides towards de-militarization. De-militarization would lower taxes and free up more federal money for education and infrastructure development. It would also end the fear, perceived or real, that is pervasive throughout Middle Eastern society. It would lessen the threat of war, and make oppressive crackdowns on liberal ideas far more difficult to carry out. Above all, it would change the face and landscape of the nation-state in the Middle East, and encourage the best and the brightest Arabs, who often see the safest path of securing their future as working for the security apparatus, to work for the private sector instead. There is not just a ‘brain drain’ as bright Arabs leave the region, but there is also a ‘brain drain’ when elite thinkers work for the government and not for the private sector.

Arab countries should make every effort to limit foreign aid, and instead take strides to stabilize themselves and encourage foreign corporate investment. Free trade agreements are the quickest way to do this, but they are not a solely effective means of developing the economy. Instead, agreements must be made with businesses themselves, and not just with Western businesses but companies throughout the globe. Yes, it is unfortunate when foreign corporate interests employ Arabs but so capitalize on the market that they make it difficult for local competition. But in a region with skyrocketing unemployment, this is hardly an excuse. Were major corporations able to operate here on a much larger scale, they would teach a merit-based mentality, while at the same time place corporate interests, that require stable nations, on the ground. These foreign corporate interests would then be able to play a huge role in further encouraging stability and democracy.

Finally, without a doubt, the most important step the Middle East could take would be in promoting Women’s Rights. This is not about forcing women to take off the hijab, but it is about encouraging women to think for themselves, choose their own destiny, not be afraid of the patriarchal system that keeps them at home or at the mercy of “honor crimes,” and make women in Arab society a viable and self-determining force. Ultimately this will lead to the necessary liberalization of Islam, end the debilitating and anti-merit, pro entitlement tribal system, and plant clearly needed seeds of feminism throughout this region.

There is no quick fix, though the first two steps could be accomplished quickly if the will to do so existed. But the fact is that there is little incentive for any democratic change to happen in the Middle East. Those in power have too few actual incentives, besides pandering to the West, to make change happen. It is certainly a bleak picture, but it is also the unfortunately reality

But let me be honest, it’s been a sloooooooooow few weeks, hense the lack of any real content. I’ve come to grips with the following issues, however:

1) America and the West are entirely responsible for the miserable condition of the Middle East. Even as much as the Arabs are a total pain in the ass, the fact is that the West has stymed the introduction of liberal democracy at every turn, and continue to do so despite what our leaders say. Take, for example, the quarter of a billion dollars in government aid we threatened to revoke from Jordan if they didn’t pass a law exempting our soldiers from being extradited to the Hague for war crimes. Now I’m not defending the Hague, but the very fact that we did this proves whole heartedly that we’re not interested in the sovereignty of developing nations, we’re merely interested in maintaining the same status quo that built the autocratic regimes that created monsters like Bin Laden and Zarqauwi.

2) Jordan’s inflation (probably 100% a year if you are really honest about it) will lead to the eventual destruction of the ruling class. The following will happen: The “Middle Class” (extremely poor by our standards) will no longer be able to make a living on an average Jordanian living in the next two years. Keeping them from raising up and overthrowing the King and the regime will come at an expense that will not last longer than three or four years after that – With the advent of weapons from Syria, Hamas and Iraq, coupled with an explosion of internet access to a large portion of the country, will mean that the per capita cost of the security regime will out pace what is possible for the Jordanian government. Thus it will do one of two things: Fold, leading to an democratically elected government full of Islamists (and the government has no protections such as a Constitutional Court that can keep these sons of bitches from taking away people’s rights on a ‘tyrany of the majority’ emphasis) who will ultimately screw the country over and after a few tries be voted out in favor of a more realistic political croud (this would be the best course of action) or far worse, America would continue to give the money that the regime needs to screw over its people, thus leading Jordan into the place that Israel is – In fact, I think that Jordan will become the new Israel of the Middle East in the next 15 years.

3) With only a week and a half of school left, I’ve begun planning my trip through Palestine and Egypt: A backpacking treck from Jerusalem, through Bethleham and Nazareth, then south to Alexandria, the Pyramids, and finally back to Amman. I fly out on June 17th.

4) If I ever hear the words Israel or Palestine or the Middle East again after I leave here, it will be too soon.

5) Despite the best interests of the Middle East, which I’ve found to be the most anti-spiritual growth spot on earth, thanks not only to the Muslims but to Christians, Jews, and the Communists who for some reason have a ton of power here, I’ve made gigantic strides in the understanding of religion in general.

On this note, I’d like to share a story I read in the New Yorker about the Episcopal Church. It turns out that the recently ordained gay Bishop of New Hampshire went to Episcopal Divinity school after growing up in an Evangelical setting. You can imagine how difficult it must have been, going from a Bible thumping church to the Episcopal ‘Catholic lite’ setting of ‘bells and smells.’ Coming into contact with the Nicene Creed, he realized he didn’t agree with large pieces of it, and he went to his minister to ask what he should do. The minister, in his infinite Episcopal wisdom (and thus proving why it is that Episcopalianism is the only legitimate form of established religion, or at least from my perspective) said, ‘there’s no problem. just don’t recite the portions you don’t agree with.’ I have to ask, HOW BLOODY SMART is that? This is the basis of religion, in this little story! In other words, there’s rules, but there only there if you want to follow them. I’ve come to realize how little Christianity has to do with Jesus, and how much it has to do with establishment in general. But I’ve also realized, having poured through the Bible over the past few months, that you can’t just be ‘all Jesus,’ either, because this a) Wasn’t what Jesus intended and b) Is viritually impossible unless you plan on being an aecetic and martyred in a horrible death, which just doesn’t happen very often these days. Therefore, the way I see it, the true “Christian” has to balance his “Christianity” with his “Christ,” and this is at the root of the story of I just told of the Nicene Creed.

Anyway, I know I went off on a rant here, but just wanted to let people know I’m still kicking.

Miss you all, see you soon,

Will

Two weekends ago, I spent a weekend with my program traveling around the south of Jordan, staying a night in Dana, which is a huge nature preserve, hiking up a huge mountain and meeting a lot of very nice Jordanians. The next day, we went to Wadi Rum, which is essentially Jordan’s Mount Everest. It’s essentially a gigantic sand box that used to be under an ocean, so imagine being at 20,000 leagues, only it’s all sand and you’re cruising along on the back of a pick up truck in 110 degree heat. It’s absolutely breath taking – the rock formations go up thousands of feet into the air, straight up. I’d never seen anything like it. We slept there that night, and rode Camels the next morning. Camels are my new favorite animal. They sound like frigging dinosaurs. We then went to Aqaba, where we spent the day on the Red Sea snorkling. Actually, we were right across from where those jerks blew up a resort last week in Egypt.

Then this past week I continued my recent addiciton: Spending 2 hours a day at the gym. I haven’t felt this good since I was 18 playing lacross, and today I officially benched 150 pounds! So Ned, watch out, I’ma beat the crap out of you when I get back.

My friend from GW, who’s studying at American University in Cairo came on Wednesday and stayed through last Sunday, which was a long weekend due to the Orthodox Easter. We saw Wadi Rum again, plus spent a lot of time traveling and seeing the sites in Amman. He, Josh, had just come from Lebanon after being rejected at the boarder into Syria. He also brought me, as a present, a bottle of Jack Daniels, which of course I had to give to my room mates because THANKS JOSH BUT I HAVEN’T HAD A DRINK SINCE DECEMBER. So nice to know what my friends think of me, though still, a nice gift.

This past week after Josh left, I’ve been trying to stay dry (it rained for two days) and been going to the gym, and trying to actually get healthy.

By the end of the weekend, it will be May!!!

PS We got a boot leg copy of V for Vendetta here and I have to say it is the most important movie to be released in America since Oliver Stone’s Malcolm X. Everyone must see it at once!

Miss everyone at home, can’t wait to see you all,
Will

Now, I realize, 48 hours later, that I should not have been so harsh. The word of caution I received from my parents regarding what I posted was both in good faith and good advice, and I should have not have taken it with such a grain of salt. The fact is, nobody is going to show up and attack me or the folks that I live with. But my point is that if they do, I doubt it will be because of this Blog.

My message here is that I will not (sorry Dad) do much to censure myself on this Blog – I feel that it is important to not build a wall between my reporting of my time here and the facts themselves. Jordan is a dangerous place, but so is the rest of the world. At the same time, there’s very little crime here, and I haven’t refrained this much from “risky activity,” as they put it in health class in middle school, since I was 14. I’m going to the gym two hours a day, I know a lot of Jordanians, and I’m very smart about not being the softest target on the block.

All in all, I assure you I will continue to be frank in this forum, but I also am aware that there are people out there who are worried about me, and don’t need to be hearing my snide comments, nor see on this Blog anything that they might perceive as dangerous. I will do my best to be tactful, though as most of you know, that’s never been my strong suit.

With regards to my trip, see my post tomorrow. Miss everyone!
Will